Thursday, January 31, 2008

leading in prayer

I’m sitting at Starbucks, listening to Sarah McLaughin, drinking my favorite tea (passion with raspberry), and feeling completely convinced that I live the most enchanted life. I remember missing these moments when I was in Chile. I know this moment here and now is special and I will miss it when it is gone. I will think back on my days in seminary and think they were the best of my life. I have two jobs I enjoy, an amazing school I attend, and a deep realization that the grace that permeates my life has nothing to do with my merit, but a loving God.
I am haven’t forgotten this blog. I just have been in a funny place of life. I am on winter break, kinda. I have both my jobs in full force and am trying to read ahead for this upcoming semester. Life might seem slow but I am telling you, the Holy Spirit rests for no one and no season. He has continued this work in my life that He began so long ago. The more recent conviction has been in the area of prayer.
I took a seminar class with Dr. Witmer a few weeks ago. It was on Leadership. During the class I was horrified by the ugliness of my heart that the Lord let me see. Indeed, I am a power hungry wolf. I have been blessed with the gift of leadership and during the class I realized how much I have abused this gift for my own self gratification. I love the feeling of power that comes with positions of leadership. I love the respect that comes with it. And that scares me. You know what else scares me? The lack of time I spend praying for those I lead. I wrote my final paper for the seminar on this process of realization that I went through. Here is peek at what I wrote:

One of the tests the Lord has given me to examine my heart and tell me if I am approaching the sheep as a shepherd or a power hungry wolf is my desire to pray for them. Power hungry wolves do not care to pray for the sheep- they just want power over the sheep. Shepherds on the other hand realize that the sheep ultimately belong to the Lord and find themselves on their knees in prayer for their sheep. Even the Great Shepherd Jesus spent time praying for the sheep that had been entrusted to Him. I am very quick to speak into women’s lives and slow to pray for them.

Friday, January 18, 2008

a change of heart

So I have shared enough of my heart on this blog to validate the name "heart" of lippy. Often though, my entries have been filled with honesty about lonliness and dealing with singlehood. Tonight I write something new. For the last few weeks I have seen a distinct change in my heart.
In fact, it started on the first of this year. I was convicted over Christmas break of my tendency toward inappropriate friendships with guys. Friendships that go deep way too fast and that I use for emotional validation. So I asked the Lord to teach me to have appropriate relationships with guys in 2008. And before I knew it, He did more than teach me- He changed me. Except for a few short months in college when I pondered the single life, I have spent most of my life wondering the who, when, and where of meeting that special someone. I have dreamed of being married, having kids, being a wife and mom.
But the last three weeks those thoughts have been far from my mind. Instead they have been replaced with gratitude to the Lord for giving me this time to be single. I am so happy to be in a place where my only real concern is my relationship with the Lord. It has been such a blessing to go through life genuinely joyous. I am going through my days really happy. It's not that I wasn't happy before, but I felt like something was missing, like I needed something or someone in my life. I know someday I'll probably want to get married, be a wife, have kids. But today I am just thankful for the chance to be alone with God.

Thursday, January 17, 2008


a lofty calling indeed

“Whatever “call” a man may pretend to have, if he has not been called to holiness, he certainly has not been called to the ministry” Spurgeon letters p. 9

“Our own hearts are deceitful so that truth lies not on the surface but must be drawn up from the deepest well.” Spurgeon lettersp.9

I have never been more convinced of the lofty calling of pastors. And indeed it must be a calling. For a pastor must have so many of certain qualities, and certain temperaments that for the incredible combination to be present in any one man, it must be truly grace from the hand of God.
First, any minister of the Lord must be saved. This requirement alone places the man in the most blessed of all positions. No man should call forth another into a land he has not been himself.
Second, the man must be godly for he must be a light to his congregation. He must exemplify holiness and righteousness in his public and personal life. There are many who know of the Lord’s salvation and yet hold on to their old ways. If they are indeed saved, they shall escape the flames of hell if only by an inch. But a minister of the Lord must have a life that has been through and through transformed by the grace and mercy of His Holiness.
No minister will be perfect in his personal holiness and therefore he must be humble before the Lord. His desire to be holy will only be completed by his humbling of himself before the Almighty Lord, declaring his righteousness the work of the Lord Himself. This attribute is vital. For any minister who works for his own glory has no place in the kingdom. His very understanding of the Gospel is false and leads to death. For it is by grace he has been saved. The works that Lord prepared for His followers are to be done in humility.
There are many more requirements upon those chosen for the work of ministry, but to list them would be a task far too great for this blog. These primary qualifications are more than enough to show the seriousness of the calling to ministry. It must not be taken lightly but indeed tested and proved to be the true calling in one’s life. There is no amount of prestige, power, or honor that a man should pursue in the title of minister outside of the true calling of the Lord to that blessed position.

Friday, January 04, 2008

Sweet Jesus

A friend of mine gave a concert last night. His name is Ben Moore and he's one of the few Anglicans at Westminster. I had no clue that he was so talented musically (goes to show that seminary nerds can have other talents). After enjoying the concert, I took one of his cds home and found a song that really touched my heart. I'm not technologcally advanced and I don't know how to share the song with you guys, so I'll just share the lyrics here and if you want me to email you the song, just ask.

Sweet Jesus

In the darkest of midnights
I’ll keep reaching for those stars
Though I’m blind to myself and truth seems so far
I’ve got the same old digressions
And the same old doubts and fears
But I will jump for joy
When my homeland appears

Sweet Jesus, sweet Jesus
Where are you tonight?
Cuz it’s been so long since we’ve seen heaven’s light

Where the wonder of the world
And the kindness of the soul
And the universe of ideas are neat to behold
The glory of goodness and beauty so sublime
In the face of our savior at the end of all time

Sweet Jesus, sweet Jesus
You’re right by my side
Like an ocean that surrounds me
So deep, pure, and wide

We must press on like the heroes
And push through the pain
Sometimes crawling for days despite being lame
We see the glory of goodness and beauty so sublime
In the face of our savior at the end of all time

Sweet Jesus, sweet Jesus
You’re right by my side
Like an ocean that surrounds me
So deep, pure, and wide

Thursday, January 03, 2008

Tuesday, January 01, 2008

Some photos from the awesome weekend!

The view of my life
Yeah! for New Years!!!
the Shaunathon and I
yeah, its just a five
at Starbucks
My boy Felix
Justin and Melissa
Lizzy and I right at the New Year countdown!
Mi hermana y yo

My girl!
Lonnie and his guitar skills
Our shabbat service
The two loud ones
being loud

In front of Time Square
Central Park
What a great city!

No Arielle, you cannot bring home that Christmas tree!

My dearest sweetest Liz
Melissa, our fearless worship leader
My team!
Passing out tracks
In front of Macy's