So much has been going on over the last few weeks. There is nothing truly monumental, but the little pieces of life seem to be moving mightily. Because it's past midnight, and I should be going to bed, Im going to brush over the pieces. Sorry for the lack of depth, but maybe with these large brush strokes you can see the quick and steady current of my life.
Over the last two weeks, I have been praying for some of my friends. I've been carrying around a prayer journal and using my spare minutes to pray throughout the day. It's been a deep blessing in my life and I have found myself praying more and more as the days go on.
One of the biggest blessings of the prayer was in the Lord blessing me with the opportunity to pray as part of the service this Sunday. I don't take anything I do for the church lightly, so what could have been just a simple and easy prayer turned into an hour of reading my bible, reflecting on what kind of prayer would best serve and lead the church, a small but real moment of fear of man, an almost withdrawing from the responsibility, and then finally a realization that any fear I have is a fear of man. For God gives me the right to pray, because of HIS righteousness.
I started having an asthma attack the friday before my birthday. So its been over a week of wheezing and coughing. Its allergies, and I got myself to the dr. who put me on a steroid inhaler. It's working, kinda. But it does mean that I spend my day feeling my lower lungs wheezing as I breathe in and out. Feels almost like my stomach grumbling, but its my lungs.
We have a visitor at our church right now. His name is Howard and he is a friend of one of the guys in the church. He is only here for a few weeks (he leaves this friday) but he has been such a breath of fresh air. He works with small groups at Covenant Life Church in DC (it's CJ Mahaney's church). He has been helping the guys with their accountability group, and even giving us some guidance for our girls group. But even more than the logistical help, he has been refreshing because the guy just quotes scripture. Every time I have asked him anything, his answer is always half just scripture quotes. It's cool. It's a good reminder of what our sure foundation is. I realized in my conversations with him that I know a lot of theology, and in many ways, its good theology (or so I think!) but my intake of the Word is so low. I seem to have forgotten that my joy and peace come from the Gospel that is proclaimed through these very scriptures. I doubt their power in my life. And really, let's call it for what it is. My attitude toward the scripture- laziness, disbelief, and apathy- is sin. This realization has driven me appropriately to the Lord and His Word. I have been praying for a renewed love for His Word.
Beyond these things, the in and out of each day has been quite the same. I am still plugging away at work, learning to love the kids better, trying to not think too hard about the educational philosophy that I am promoting by being here.
My desire to return to Chile has been tempered by the realization that I wont be moving around much more after this, that I feel like a season of settling down is coming.
My desire to serve others, especially in my church, has been so fulfilled with the Lord bringing incredible opportunities for me to lay down my life in small ways for people in my life.
And my desire for a husband... well, that's always there. I am still praying that God would teach me to glorify Him, to believe that His goodness extends into every season.
I have some solid blog posts on some of these issues, but they will have to be for another night. For now, I go to sleep, knowing that my rest is in the One whose angels encamp around me.