I can't believe we have already made it to March 30th. It seems like just yesterday that we were in 2009. This year has flown by. The other day I took some time to read through my journal. I started at New Years and worked through to this week. I'm usually a very diligent journaler. I started journaling when I was about 12 and it has been a consistent part of my life since. But 2010 has been moving too quickly to keep up. The days drag on as I'm at work, but the weeks fly by. I hope all of 2010 will be this way.
I'm happy enough with my life situation now, I don't love my job, but it's not miserable. I don't love this culture, but it's livable. And I do love what I have seen the Lord doing in my life. I have seen Him restoring what I lost (hope, joy, love) and I realize how desperate I am for His grace in my life. I have felt His redemption in a real way over the last year. I have been overwhelmed recently by how broken we all are. I am good at pretending like I have my life together, but the truth is that I sin in horrible ways and my sins hurt those in my life. I recently saw how my selfishness hurt a dear friend of mine. I can apologize all I want, but if my heart isn't changed by God's mercy, I will never be able to truly love them.
And here is where I pray that the Lord would use this year as it flies by, that it would be a year fully and wholly glorifying to Him. That He would use this broken sinner, who tends to hurt her friends with her impatience and self-centeredness. And that He would grant me a deeper knowledge of Him.