Wednesday, August 06, 2008

yo quisiera, dreaming of what isn't

One of my favorite songs from my life in Chile. It's about a guy who is best friends with a girl and who wants nothing more than to be her everything, but she seems blind to his desire for more. Anyways, I have been listening to some of my old school favorites (Reik, Orishas, RBD) and missing that country I called mi pais for so long. Will I end up back there? Who knows. I miss the warmth of the people, the men who unashamedly make professions of love to the women they desire, the kids who think its normal to spend time with their abuelos.

The curse of being young, time moves so slowly and we are captive to the years that hold us still. This week I have nothing and everything to do and all I can think of is how much I miss my busy life. I love having a million and one things to do. I hate sitting at home. My first few months in Chile were filled with nothingness. How did I survive?

I feel so useless here. I know there is a purpose in this time alone. And I am not talking about being single (although it does easy apply). I am alone here in the sense that those friends who truly know me, who "get" me, who push me forward in life, aren't around.

I miss my coffee dates with Chubs, curled up on couches drinking lattes. I miss coming home to Ashlee and cooking dinner together while dancing to Ciara. And how could I not miss Rachel and Carlos and Tahoe Joe's happy hour? Danielle and I stuffing our faces with the free bread and jam at the hostels so we wouldnt have to buy lunch. My best friends, they seem like pieces of my heart that are missing here at Westminster.


Rachel said...

YAY! I love those pictures...such fun memories...dancing in the middle of the road, loved it. I miss you too!!! Sabes que te quiero tanto tanto tanto...y vamos a viver cerca alguno dia! Si, se puede!! ;-)

Anonymous said...

Haha. Of course the mention of me would include stuffing our faces with food. It was good bread too.


ali said...

uhhhhhh excuse me becka... don't you miss me???? i'm included in that chiloe pic you posted with the distorted faces afterall (or maybe my comp is just malfunctioning, but something looks odd abotu that pic)