Saturday, August 23, 2008

easy in love

I find myself seated at Starbucks again, listening to some Jason Mraz. I associate him with Cal Poly. I'm not sure why really. I think he came to CP before he was really famous. Or maybe it's that his music is so laid back like San Luis Obispo. Who knows.
One of his songs, I'm yours, is the ultimate Cal Poly song. It makes love sound so easy, so care free and light. I know that it isn't. Or at least my experience has taught me that it isn't. It is painful, hard, and requires more of us than Hollywood lets on. But I remember all the couples in college who seemed to just float into relationships. They met, fell in love, married and moved into little one bedroom apartments. It all looked so easy from the outside. Was it really? Mraz's song reminds me of that ease, just floating into the relationship, being utterly in love and leaving us single girls somewhere between despair and hope.
Now, half a decade later, I look back and realize how much of perception has changed. I now view relationships as challenges. They may be worth it, but they are challenges none the less. I can't imagine being in a relationship, but still find myself wanting nothing less than to be a wife to a godly man. Maybe some day... maybe not. Odd to be old enough to look back on these thoughts and see the progression through emotions. Is this what aging is all about?

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