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Sorry for the angst

So the last few days have been filled with a lot of feelings. Up and down and everywhere. My poor friends have had to listen to my complaints on different situations and wipe the tears from my eyes. My last posting is just an example of the extreme emotions I have felt the last few days.
There is a lot going on in my heart and I am learning that I cannot deny the pain that I am feeling, nor should I ignore it. This is a time when I can learn to truly cleave to the Lord. I have found myself praying this simple prayer throughout the day: Lord, deal with my heart. Any pain and frustration. Any hopes crushed. All of these push me into the arms of the Lord.
Maybe I am not doing enough now, maybe Im not distracted enough. Maybe I have too much time on my hands and that is making me think about things too much. But really, is thinking about things too much possible? Do I always need to be distracted? Anyways, either way, my prayer for today and tomorrow is: Lord, deal with my heart.

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